Love is More Than A Four Letter Word

Ah yes, the ever relying, ever strived for, what everyone dreams of and hopes for, and searches all their life to find it. Yea, it does happen to everyone ones in a lifetime. I love a lot of things (yes, love is not only regarded to another person), music, movies, tv shows, money, people... etc. The level of love for each does differ but, there's always a dilemma when it comes to love, something I call, Self. When it comes to love, you will naturally end up thinking about yourself.

True love is being selfless... True, but no one can truly say that they have true love. I for one have been rather selfish. Yes, I admit. Most often I like to put my feelings and considerations first before anyone else. I apologize if at times I put anyone down for my benefit. I do it sub-consciously and I do regret the feeling after. At the end of the day, I don't think that you can love someone and not care about yourself, c'mon even the reasons for loving someone isn't selfless...

I know that sometimes one can love so many things at one time. Is that wrong? I don't believe so, loving and being loyal is a whole different topic all together, but then again when it comes to loving a person, you must be faithful and loyal. I hate the feeling that I have been disloyal to God lately. I do stumble at times, and this here is my confession. It's hard to stay focussed to one when there are so many other distractions out there. I just gotta work harder at it. My ultimate goal is to live my life for His purpose after all...

On another note, is it ever too early to start looking for love? I keep seeing everyone around me hooking up or coupling. Yea, I find it rather weird, cause for me, I really don't find the reasons for dating. Hmmm, yea, I should start maturing now. I do sound like a little kid don't I? My colleagues think I look too kiddish and innocent... T_T I hate me... But that ain't entirely bad lar. Just that at most times, it's bad. :(

Anyway, that's just my short take on the L word. I guess I'll learn more about it in the years to come, and hopefully when love walks in, music and movies will not be it.

:)

What happened in the day? Well, I personally loved today and tomorrow (friday). :) I'm sorry, it's midnight, but its still the 25th to me. Moving on, today was great cause my advertising class ended early :) So, joy to us all... And yea, we had mass comm tutorial... Cool stuff :) We watched a movie, Shattered Glass. What I learned? Journalism ethics. Keep that in mind... It was a rather interesting movie that really keeps you thinking... YES! And tomorrows Comp Graphics class got canceled! I finally get a whole day of nothing to do :) But I shall be a good boy and start on my assignment that is due in 2 weeks... :)

peace ya'll ;)

Sleepy, BUT I need to get things done....

Oh God, I can't believe I've been staying up till 2am these pass few days. YES even now. God, I swear I could just die, but I shall be strong and continue to press on to get through the day. My life's an irony I tell you. Why do I say so? Well, it's maybe cause I'm selfish, that or maybe life just like to play around with me.

I'm currently stuck in a dilemma. I find myself not being able to work enough. On one hand I love that I have a little more chill time to just be able to relax and maybe do some work, but on the other hand, I suffer financially. I squeeze my wallet for enough dough to help me survive a month. Yes, I do not like to save. Like I've always said, the main purpose of me working is for me to be able to enjoy going out, buying things whenever and not worry about asking or begging from my parents. Then again, it's not as if I don't want to work, it's the fact that my classes always get in the way of me working. For now, at least, I should put my priority to my studies. God help me.

Another thing is, with reference to the above, I have been really lazy lately. With work ending so late, I get up late as well, practically just enough time for me to wash up and head to class. Yea, that's screwing up my life. I need time to focus on my assignments. I'm so way behind everyone and the pressure is getting to me. It's frustrating to know that you have to get something done but whenever you get the motivation or when you're finally in the right mood to do your work, other things obstructs you. Yes, like work, for me. Nowadays, use any free available time I have to go online and watch korean dramas.

I know that I'm in a crunch for time, but please just leave me be :( I want my work done a.s.a.p. as well. All I can do now is just pray real hard for His mercy and grace and hope to Him that he'll give me the strength and self-control I really need :)

I need a balance in life. And money, more and more of $$ :)

Shoot, dang it... FAIL!!! :(

NOoooo!! I think I suck... :(

So, I think we're all familiar with the word 'Procrastination'? Yea, we all know it very very well... Lately for me, procrastination has been following me around and clinging on to me way too tightly. I can't seem to shake it off. Dear God help me PLEASE!

I hate the feeling of last minute work. Honestly, yes, stress does help motivate you to work hard, but when you did your work within the last hour or so, it turns around and bites you in the behind :( That's as much as I can say or describe how I did my last assignment, and damn it is a disgrace to all "artists" out there. Yea, I do want to achieve a high level of creativity, one where I can come up or create a work of art, a masterpiece. Hell no, from where I am now, it'll take a miracle. And no thanks to my "BFF" Mr. Procrastination. I just wanna do my best and give my all and show everyone that I am capable to be creative and also to myself that I did not choose the wrong course...

With that said. Procrastination, we're over. I don't friend you no more. And laziness, stay the hell away from me :)

This here is going to make you cry (or laugh) but do try to control yourself as to not get seriously injured. Voila... My first Computer Graphics assignment on creating symbols, based on pictures of animals (3 different animals to be exact).

For your entertainment :)

Frustration's Causing Me To Stress OUT!

Argghhh... My assignment is really killing my nerves, if that's even possible. I can't seem to get Illustrator right. You know the feeling where you try and try to make something the way you imagine it, but somehow, a little twit here and a slight change there and suddenly BOOM!, your work seems ruined... I'm losing my patience, something I really need to work on more.

Today, I shall share a brief account on my college life. As said in previous post, I'm really liking the environment, the subjects (although it does get boring and frustrating), the really cool lecturers and what is classes without great awesome classmates? Well, to be honest, I never really gave much interest into making friends or getting to know people more when at college. I guess I just thought that the hassle of finding a crowd and fitting in will just involve more hard work. I guess I wanted to be more serious when in college, focussing on my course and my work. But that ain't the case, I honestly thing that the people that makes up my class are the most diverse and uniquely weird (in a good way). Yea, they aren't your everyday-next-door kinda of people. It's awesome how everyone seems to be so different yet are able to be comfortable with each other. And it's great that, somehow, I feel comfortable being just the way I am.

No, I'm not saying that it's fairy tale land. C'mon, let's get real. What is perfection anyway? One thing I realize through my 19 years of living is that there are always clicks. Everywhere you go, you'll tend to see people of the same character and/or liking stick together. That's not so bad, i guess in a way that's life. We tend to draw nearer to the "same kind". But thankfully, I'm able to not only be but also see others get comfortable even when not around their "own kind".

An awesome course, with fun people... Yea, that's my kind of college. Though I know that my semester will only get harder, but ultimately, it's good to know that you have people there going through the hardships with.

A New Epic Starts Now...

This blog is really verging on it's death. I'm trying hard to keep it alive, but somehow I haven't been motivated enough to post up stuff. Right, with that aside...

I never really enjoyed the simplicity of life. I kinda like the varied surprises and unknown happenings. So yea, mundane boring repetitive days are an absolute NO for me. It's great and all to be prepared for your upcoming battles, but not to the extent where the outcome becomes predictable. Maybe my chilling attitude and worry-less character for tomorrow is causing me procrastination and laziness... I admit that nothing fears me much, I'm prepared to do anything to try to survive and honestly, I feel I'm becoming used to failures. So, the next time you expect great achievement from me, think again. Not that I hate to be expected to succeed, but sometimes disappointing others puts you down as well. Where am I coming from? Well, this is my take since working, honestly sometimes I feel useless and such a failure there... but then there'll be moments where I feel I've achieved good things for my store. So, does that make me a failure? I don't know, you tell me. But it's not complete failure if you do have a certain success record. Damn, this is pretty confusing, but I know that I ain't a failure in His eyes.

I've lately been working hard to keep my spiritual life on the top notch, even though it's hard. But I wanna be faithful to God and I wanna be consistent in doing my quite time and serving Him. Most of the time taking the easy way out and wanting to live the worldly life seem so tempting, but I've got to constantly remind myself what my purpose in life is and what is best for me, in the long run. I'm getting there, praying real hard for the passion in me to keep burning strong...

On another note of my life, College! So far, it's been awesome... :) I've already had a couple of assignments piling. And as usual, my pathetic procrastinating buddy keeps getting in the way of me completing them assignments. I really shouldn't take them lightly. But that's just the way it is now... but overall, things has been fun... Completing my first homework, which to me is a pretty good first attempt, is really great. Computer graphics class is super fun but super difficult to master. I'll be needing a whole lot more of practice with my "BFF" Adobe Illustrator.

Just so you are clear, the photo above was copied from the internet... It was an awesome shot and edit. Yea, ok maybe it seems easy but I have not a clue how it's done, yet. But my goal is to achieve a great edited photograph :) The below on the other hand is my first attempt on copying the almost similar... Of course my work was not exactly but from a distance it's more or less similar... at least it doesn't look off... I have another assignment with Illustrator due Friday, I'll make it proud to be looked upon :)

keep on shining :)