Gives You Hell

"I wake up every evening,

with a big smile on my face,...

truth be told I miss you,

truth be told I'm lying..."

I keep telling myself everything is ok, everything will be alright. Who am I kidding, I am lost in a world of the unknown and have no clue what to do or what my next move in life is. It's one thing to hide your feelings, but to lie to your own self is beyond messed up. The one thing you owe to your self is your honesty. I know that what ever happens, I will always have myself. I know it sounds weird but it does help. Telling yourself that it will work out and seeing things as it really is, that is what I have been doing, and truth be told, it does make life so much easier. I mean, lying to people is hard enough, but to have to lie to yourself too? That is just too much, life is to short to live in misery.

Last night, watching Fighting with my close friends was awesome. The show was alright, but getting to catch up with people I have not seen/met up for almost 3 months was really what I needed. I guess I can say that we have all moved on, and grew up. But some things will just stay the same. I need people like this in my life, someone I can count on and just have a good time to talk with. Unfortunately not all things always have a happy ending, the movie lasted from 9.25pm to 11.15pm. I only reached home about midnight. God, was I beat when I reached home. I really was exhausted to the last drop of energy, I crashed and when I awoke, it was 7am. I feel really agitated now in work, and I hate feeling tired when in an environment that is just so stressing in itself. Ok. so maybe the office is not as terrible, but when you're new and holding a temp. job, you need to just show that you're at your best, and I guess up your game. But that's not the case for today... I'm sleepy, sad, annoyed and just need rest.

I got a text message from Venuga this morning, a friend of mine from sec school, asking if I want to go for a movie with my prev prefect board. That will be amazing, as some of them are leaving to further their studies overseas, but the downside is, it will be a midnight movie, or at least a late night movie... God kill me now!! Should I go? Should I not go? !!! Did I forget to mention it's Transformers: the Revenge of the Fallen? :D We'll see...

Keep looking :)